


Now I Wanna Hold You

by Hawkguys_and_Coffee



Category: Hadestown - Mitchell
Genre: Angst™, F/M, Fluff and Angst, How Do I Tag, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I haven't watched Hadestown yet but I'm trying my hardest, I hope, I promise no smut here, My First Work in This Fandom, Someone give Eurydice a hug, They deserve a happy ending, and also Orpheus, and then happy again, but it's not here, i tried my hardest, just dish them out like candy, no beta we die like men, starts as fluff but gets sad, this is my first fanfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-20
Updated: 2019-07-20
Packaged: 2020-07-09 05:09:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19882168
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hawkguys_and_Coffee/pseuds/Hawkguys_and_Coffee
Summary: He continued to explore her, hands tracing every line and every scar on her skin. It felt good, better than anything she had ever experienced before.  It wasn't until he tugged at the waistband of her jeans that she stopped him."Orpheus, don't," Eurydice said, breaking away from him for the first time in minutes and putting a hand over his wrist. They were both slightly out of breath, hearts racing, hair ruffled, and eyes dilated in the heat of the moment.He pulled away and looked at her in confusion.  "Why not?"She bit her lip, wondering how to word her feelings. Shame bubbled in her chest like poison. Instead of meeting his eyes, Eurydice twisted one of the buttons on his worn shirt. "I've never done this sort of thing for love before."--Orpheus and Eurydice on their wedding night.





	Now I Wanna Hold You

Eurydice was used to quick, spur of the moment, unplanned decisions. For her entire life, she had always found a way to survive. It was more than second nature at this point. If there was no food, she'd just find a new way to get some. If a town had nothing left to provide, she would simply pack her bag and wander to somewhere new. 

Nothing was permanent, she knew. Nothing would last forever in a world like this.

So why did her love for Orpheus feel so different?

If someone had told last week, that, in a few days, she would fall in love with the greatest musician to ever walk the Earth, Eurydice would have laughed out loud. But now? Now she was laying in bed across from Orpheus mere hours after their wedding. It still felt like a dream.

Never had she ever felt great love for such a person. He seemed beautiful to her, with his hazel eyes and mussed hair and lopsided grin. Orpheus's suspenders were slipping off his shoulders, making him seem vulnerable, open.

So far, the night had been nothing more than chaste kisses and muttered love confessions. It didn't seem like much, but to Eurydice it was everything.

She pulled him in for another kiss, wanting him to know how much she adored him, wanting him to know how much he meant to her. He was her north star, her light in times of darkness. Her shelter from the cold. Her beacon of hope. The one she adored.

As they got closer, Orpheus's hand made its way to her waist, pulling her so near that she could smell his sweet scent of earth and leather. "I love you," she murmured gently as she leaned into him. It can out slightly muffled.

Even without looking, Eurydice knew that he was grinning. "I love you more than the stars love the sky," he replied before placing a feathery kiss on her lips.

She traced her hands across the ridges of his spine. He had a hunger-pang frame, but that didn't make him any less perfect. Even through his cotton shirt she could feel his warmth. Orpheus wove her dark hair in between his fingers lazily, even going as far as tickling her with it. She giggled and kissed him quickly on the cheek.

And it was like the world was made new again. When Eurydice was with Orpheus, her worries of shelter and food and surviving disappeared, leaving just him and her for all of eternity.

She melted into him, pressing closer and closer until her arms were around his and he hers. It felt like nothing she had ever known before, to be with Orpheus. 

Somewhere along the way, the kisses grew more passionate. Eurydice wrapped her arms around Orpheus's neck so he was almost bending down to reach her.

He laughed gently and moved so his hands fidgeted the threadbare hem of her shirt. A silent question. Without so much of a second thought, she gently guided his calloused fingers to her bare waist. Orpheus's hands settled on her hips, pressing at the small of her back to bring her in closer. He was warm. Eurydice could feel her heart practically burst from her chest at the simple movement. It felt electrical to be this close to him, so much so that she let a little groan escape her lips.

She, in turn, began to gently undo the buttons of his worn shirt, trying not to rip the thin material. Fumbling for a moment, she somehow managed to get the top three undone. She gently glided her touch across his shoulders, relishing the soft noises he made against her lips.

Orpheus traced meaningless patterns on the small of her back, his touch lighter than a feather. Eurydice shivered and kissed him on the neck, wanting more, wanting him.

He continued to explore her, hands tracing every line and every scar on her skin. It felt good, better than anything she had ever experienced before. It wasn't until he tugged at the waistband of her jeans that she stopped him.

"Orpheus, don't," Eurydice said, breaking away from him for the first time in minutes and putting a hand over his wrist. They were both slightly out of breath, hearts racing, hair ruffled, and eyes dilated in the heat of the moment.

He pulled away and looked at her in confusion. "Why not?"

"Just. . . don't." It wasn't that she didn't want it. Hell, Eurydice wanted it more than anything. She new he did too. But that wasn't how things worked. She sighed and said, "I don't want to do this just yet. Sorry."

There was a stretch of silence, not awkward, but not comfortable. Eurydice looked away, not wanting to see what her lover's reaction would be. "Oh. Okay," Orpheus murmured softly, moving to cup her cheek gently. His hazel eyes still had the loving spark in them. "There's nothing to be sorry for, 'Rydice. We don't have to do this tonight." 

"I know, it's just-" She bit her lip, wondering how to speak her feelings. Shame bubbled in her chest like poison. Instead of meeting his eyes, Eurydice twisted one of the buttons on his worn shirt. "I've never done this sort of thing for love before."

"What have you done it for?" Orpheus's voice was hesitant and meek, much like his personality. He was still holding her, but Eurydice was scared that he would push her away the moment she opened her mouth. 

"Food. Money. Shelter." Not love- Necessities.

He met her gaze again, but this time there was a deep understanding in them. His eyes held many more emotions than she could count. It was like Orpheus knew exactly what she was saying, exactly what she was going to say. The girl glanced away, ashamed. 

"We have forever ahead of us. You can take your time." Orpheus brushed her bangs from her eyes gently, a sad smile on his face.

"I'm sorry," She stated, burying her head into his chest. His heartbeat thrummed to a steady beat, and it calmed her.

"There's nothing to be sorry for." He repeated as he placed a light kiss on her hair.

Eurydice felt that she didn't deserve this. In a way, it was annoying how okay Orpheus was with this situation. How could he still want her when she was tainted, impure? She bit her lip and focused back on one of the buttons on his shirt, noticing half heartedly that it didn't match the others.

"Last winter was bad," She started, voice barely above a whisper. "I needed a roof over my head, food to eat, a reason to keep going. . ." Her voice caught in her throat, but she pressed onwards. If Orpheus was her husband, then he at least had a right to know. "There were a few well-off folks where I was staying. I made a deal with them. Food for. . . other things." 

Eurydice could remember those days far too vividly. Back when her boots were littered with holes and her jacket had been threadbare. Back when she didn't know where her next meal was coming from. Back when she didn't know if she would wake up in the morning.

Aristaeus had found her wandering the streets one night and offered her a deal. Eurydice, who had been desperate at the time, had agreed without knowing what he was saying. Anything for a warm meal and a night away from the bitter winter winds. An unpleasant shiver went down her spine, locked away memories resurfacing. Hours staying out in the cold in hope that someone would find her and offer a deal. Countless things she would to quiet the dull pang of hunger that would settle deep within her bones each day.

"They were never rude- always respectful. I know I shouldn't have done those things, but it was that or starve. And-" She faltered, voice suddenly thick with emotion. Eurydice squeezed her eyes shut, balling up Orpheus's shirt in her fist. "And I just kept doing it. I had to. One night for one meal." Eurydice pulled away from her love and wrapped her arms around herself. A panicked feeling settled deep in her gut at the thought of what her lover would say. Orpheus stayed silent. "Please say something," She whispered. His voice would at least be better than the sickening silence that threatened to envelope her.

He didn't reply for a long time. He just hugged her tighter and ran his fingers through her hair, murmuring sweet nothings in her ear. After what felt like eternity, he said, "Desperation makes us do things we wouldn't do so regularly. The past is the past, and there's nothing you can do to change it." Orpheus slid his hand under her chin and guided her face to his so they were making eye contact. "I wouldn't have you any other way."

Tears filled Eurydice's eyes until she couldn't hold them back any more. A half sob half laugh escaped her lips as she met Orpheus's eyes again. All she could see was his love towards her. No hatred, no disgust. Just love.

"I don't deserve what you're doing- I don't deserve you."

He smiled gently. "Yes, you do. You're beautiful and perfect and kind, and, best of all, a fighter like the great goddess Athena. You're here because you never gave up. You've always found a way to keep going. You're stronger than I could ever be." A hush seemed to fall over the two of them. "You're my Eurydice."

"And you're my Orpheus." Was all she could manage.

"I wouldn't have it any other way."

And so they lay there for gods know how long, simply being. Eurydice felt safe under his arms. Nothing could harm her there, not even the mellowing fear of the oncoming winter or the dreaded idea of abandonment. It seemed strange, this comforting feeling.

"Tell me something," Eurydice murmured quietly when all her tears were dry.

"Tell you something. . ." He hummed in though. "Tell you what?"

"I dunno." She glanced around the room, eyes landing on his lyre. "Tell me about your music. How'd you start playing the lyre?"

"Well," Orpheus began, still combing his fingers through her hair. The small action grounded her. "My mother was a musician. She was always away, playing her aulos at speakeasies and such. My father. . . I never met him. Left before I was born."

"I'm sorry," she said. 

Orpheus did a half shrug the best he could in his position. "It ain't a big deal. We were fine, me and my mother and siblings. I had a brother and three sisters, but I didn't share a father with any of them. Don't know where they ended up."

He paused for a moment in thought as if her were searching for them that very moment. "Anyways, they were all gone by the time I turned eleven. It was just too hard for my mother to support us all so they went their separate ways. It's been eight years and I still have no idea where they went. I was the only one that stayed.

"While my mother played her aulos I would sit in the back room of the bar and listen while organizing the liquor bottles. For as long as I could remember, that's how I spent my evenings. Me my music and glass bottles." Orpheus gave a breathy laugh. "Eurydice, her music was truly beautiful. It made the world seem brighter and happier and- and alive. She always told me that magic still existed in songs.

"One day- I forget how old I was- I asked her to teach me to play. At first, I wanted to learn the aulos, but she wouldn't let me. Said my voice was too good to hide behind a flute."

"She was right there," Eurydice said with a smug smile. Orpheus blushed, but she could tell he was beaming with pride.

"She found a lyre and gave it to me. Even though she didn't know much, she taught me the basic notes. I loved that instrument more than anything. I remember playing it late into the night, strumming it till my fingers bled and my arms were too tired to hold it up. 

"It was like this burden I never knew I had was released, if that makes any sense. With my lyre, I could show how the world could be. How we can change it for the better." Orpheus placed a kiss on her nose. "That's why I'm writing the song. Too bring the world back together."

Eurydice let out a laugh, then grew serious. "What happened to her? You're mother, I mean."

Her poet looked down, finding sudden interest in the pillow case. Eurydice wanted to take the pain in his eyes away. "She's gone," Orpheus whispered. "Got sick and never got better. She would have loved you though, 'Rydice. Both have the same spunk."

Eurydice traced the edges of his collar bone lightly. When he looked up to meet her gaze, she could see his eyes shine with unshed tears.

"She seemed lovely." 

Moonlight filtered in through the newly parted clouds outside, streaming through the window's thin curtains and casting shadows along the sharp edges of Orpheus's face. In the new light, she could see that only one of his sleeves were rolled up, the other reaching a little too far above his wrist to fit perfectly. Choppy hair fell in front of his eyes, covering the shimmer of his hazel eyes. His face had more than one smudge of dirt on it and his cheeks had a hollow look to them that could only be there because of hunger. Despite this, Eurydice thought that he looked ethereal, almost otherworldly with his strange beauty.

She yawned and nuzzled closer to him. "You're beautiful, you know that?"

Orpheus wiped away a stray tear with his thumb and grinned. "Go to sleep, lover. We have a long day ahead of us tomorrow. Winter's coming, after all."

She sighed, burrowing closer to him until there was barely any room in between. The girl smiled into her lover, a warm feeling settling in the pit of her stomach. When she was in Orpheus's arms the rest of the world fell away, leaving them and only them. Eurydice rested her head in the crook of his neck and placed a light kiss on his chin. For the first time in her entire life, she felt welcomed. She felt at home.

**Author's Note:**

> In Ancient Greek mythology, Orpheus had three sisters and a brother (The Graces and Linus of Thrace), so I thought I should at least mention them. Eurydice, on the other hand, was pursued by a man named Aristaeus when she was wandering a forest after her wedding (right before she got bit by a snake). That's where I got this story idea from. 
> 
> I'm actually planning out a modern au where Eurydice listens to Orpheus play on the street and offers to buy him a coffee which I'm actually having a lot of fun writing. Then again, I'm only at 2k. . .
> 
> Anyways, I hope ya'll enjoyed my trashy writing. I swear I'm trying here.


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